Nordesthetics Lithuania Tummy Tuck Breast Implant review

I arrived in Lithuania on 24th Oct 2017 with my sister, we flew with Ryanair and came in half an hour early so I was happy with that, I hate flying! Luton to Kaunas - 3 hours.
We were met at the airport by one of the clinic drivers Victoria and after a short wait for another lady who'd flown in from London we were off to the clinic.
The first thing that struck me about the clinic was that it wasn't called Nordesthetics, it is called Grozio Chirurgija, they have 3 clinics in Kaunas and I think Nordesthetics is just an umbrella name.
The plastic surgery clinic is very nice inside, clean and modern.

I had my bloods taken promptly and then my consultation with Dr. Sakalauskas. The consultation was very thorough, each operation was explained to me in depth including possible complications and expected outcomes. I had intended to have fat transfer to my breasts as we have a family history of breast cancer and I was worried about implants. On examination the Dr said I didn't actually have enough fat to make this worthwhile, this was a surprise as my own Dr had told me I was centrally obese. We discussed implants and he reassured me they would be safe placed behind the muscle and would not interfere with future breast screening. We tried some sizes and agreed that a 2 size increase was about right. I have always had very small breasts and didn't want them to be big, I just wanted to look female in my clothing. 

I was given a bra to put on to put the breast shaped silicone boob into and a vest top to put on over it which gave a better idea what I'd look like in clothing.  

After sorting the payment and paperwork we were taken to our hotel. 

We stayed at the kaunas hotel in the main tourist area. The room was a good size and clean and comfortable.

We walked up and down the strip outside the hotel looking for somewhere to eat and eventually found a nice Italian just round the corner. 

My surgery was booked for 9am the next day so I was picked up at 8.30am. On arrival I was taken to a private room and asked to put on my operating gown, I was getting nervous now! The anaethetist came to speak to me and then I went down to be drawn on by Dr Sakalauskas, this was my only complaint about the whole experience as this was done downstairs in the original consultation room which meant I had to walk past a few people waiting in reception in my gown and dressing gown which felt awkward. 

Once I was marked up it was back to the room to wait for my drip feed to be put in.

 You can see the area for the liposuction on my back and the skin area to be cut away on my stomach, one breast was lower than the other so I have a larger mark under that one for him to try and match them up. 

I'm a total baby about needles but was so scared by this point I just wanted it to be over. The anaethetist came back to take me down to theatre, I have been walked into operating theatres before and it's always a bit unnerving seeing all the equipment but he told me to lie down then covered me over with a lovely quilt, black with multi coloured flowers 😊 it was such a lovely touch and made me feel like I was just going to have a lovely sleep not be butchered to death!

He let me know he was going to start and gave me an injection into my drip feed. I have had a fair few operations and sometimes being put to sleep has been awful with the room spinning and a feeling of pressure on my head but this was very gentle I just felt a tad drowsy and that was the last thing I remember. 

When I woke up I thought they obviously hadn't started then felt my boobs and realised I was done! I remember shaking at some point but I've had that before after general anaesthetic so I wasn't concerned and they gave me a big heater and it soon stopped. I wasn't in any pain and just slept on and off.

This is how I looked when I came round enough to talk to my sister, very glamorous! 

Dr Sakalauskas came to speak to me soon after and told me my muscles had been 11cm apart. I was gobsmacked, no wonder I hadn't been able to fix them with exercise! He also gave me a bit of paper saying how much skin and fat had been removed. 

They really like to feed you and the food was pretty good if only I'd been able to enjoy it! As soon as I tried to eat I was sweating and felt sick. The nurses were very attentive and consistent with pain killers, anti biotics, sleeping pills and anti sickness injections. 

By the second day I was staring to feel quite rough, I still couldn't eat and felt really sick and dizzy. The anaethetist quickly appeared and ordered a blood test to check my haemaglobin levels and 2 minutes later a nurse appeared to take it. It was the most relaxed I've ever been about a blood test I just didn't care by this point. My blood tests came back normal and the Dr explained he thought it was due to the sudden tightness and restriction to my stomach and lungs that I was feeling sick, it was hard to breathe but he had warned me that might happen when be closed the muscles. Today was the first massage, it wasn't enjoyable and my breasts made all sorts of noise from the air trapped in the cavity which is totally normal but was unnerving all the same. We were encouraged to try to walk and later in the day they removed the catheter so then i had to get up to use the toilet.  Trying to reach the underneath of your garment to do it back up everytime is no small feat! The nurse helped the first time I went. Weirdly I could breathe easier when sat on the loo! 

I enjoyed watching the lights in the next building in the evening it felt homely. 

I shared my room with another lady who'd had a tummy tuck, she was Swedish but spoke good English and it was nice to have company. We encouraged each other to get up and use the loo etc on the second day. She had quite a bit of discomfort from her drains, mine did not bother me at all. 

On the third day I had to have my dressings changed and drains out before leaving, this was a little uncomfortable but I was glad when they were out. They gave me all the extra dressings and antiseptic spray I needed to look after the stitches for the next 2 weeks as well as pain killers, anti biotics and instructions for taking it all. I had another massage in the morning. 

I didn't really feel ready to leave for the hotel, it seemed like it would be impossible to walk downstairs to the taxi and I was worried about being sick on the journey. It was about ten minutes back to the hotel and the driver was very careful to avoid pot holes and let me put the window down. 

It was hard work and I felt self conscious when we got to the hotel as I was bent over walking. We got back to the room and I was happy to be there and able to relax. The hotel is well situated for places to get coffee and snacks so my sister was able to pop out and get me a hot chocolate and cake when I felt better. 

I managed to make it down for breakfast in the morning and met another lady walking up and down the hallway bent over, she'd had the same operation although she was a day ahead of me, it made me feel better to see someone else in the same boat. 

My sister got lunch from the supermarket across the way and I just basically sat in bed watching the English nature channel all day, many many episodes of Paul O'Grady for the love of dogs! 😄 

At dinner time we ordered food for room service which was only a €3 charge. I managed to find some plain chicken and rice and ate about half of it. 

Trying to sleep was a whole different ball game without the electric bed to help me get up and down and get me in a position that was comfortable. You are advised to sleep on your back, I cannot sleep on my back and this caused me the most problems. I tried lying on my side but that hurt the breast not resting on the bed, I discovered if I wedged a pillow between my breasts to try and support the top one that was fairly comfortable and I could get some sleep but it was not great sleep. 

The next few days went the same until the last full day when I decided I'd brave going to the shopping mall, by taxi of course, as I wanted to buy the kids little presents. It was hard work and we struggled to get help finding the taxis to go back to the hotel, they are sat at one end. 

Dressings were changed every other day and the elastic strap on the breast garment goes above the breast one day and below it the next. I was glad when I could have a shower although being out of the support garment felt worse than being in it. 

I didn't think the bruising was that bad, my stomach mostly felt numb and I wasn't really in any pain apart from when I lay on my side. 

We flew home 6 days after arriving, 5 days after the operation. Before the flight I had a final appointment with Dr Sakalauskas to check all was healing well and I was ok to go home. This was at one of their other clinics which wasn't particularly nice looking from the outside but the clinic itself was just as nice as the one where I'd had the surgery. 

I was terrified, terrified I wouldn't manage the walking at the airport, terrified someone would notice I was in pain and deem me unfit to fly. I just wanted to get home but didn't want to do the journey. 

For reference Ryanairs website says you can fly 5 days after simple abdominal surgery or 10 days after complicated abdominal surgery, I didn't feel like what I'd had done was simple but then it is fairly common. Anyway I got away with it, I was more or less straight when walking, I managed to pull my case and my sister lifted it up for scanning etc. The hardest part was queuing to board, it was so packed and I was trying not to get hit by someone and there was nowhere to sit so I tried to sit on my case but that required using your ab muscles so I just had to stand. It seemed a long walk to the aeroplane and I was glad to sit down. 

I'd been sitting all week but with my feet up, sitting properly in a chair was uncomfortable. I've had varicose veins in the past so I was worried about the flight, my sister kept making me get up and walk down the Isle, I felt like an idiot keep getting up and got stuck at one end when they started serving drinks and was hanging onto the wall to try to stand, people probably thought I was drunk! 

I was so glad to get home and my mum had come to the airport to meet me even though she was going straight back home on the bus as my husband and kids had come to get me. 

I have been doing a lot of resting since I came home, I've watched 7 seasons of once upon a time on Netflix in just 3 weeks! I went back to work last weekend at 3.5 weeks after surgery and that was tough. I work in a supermarket but because I haven't been on my feet for more than an hour, a 4 hour shift was pretty brutal. 

It's 4 weeks today since my surgery and I am just starting to feel a little stronger, I managed to tidy my sons bedroom yesterday, it took me 5 hours with a few breaks. 

It still hurts my boobs a bit to lie on my side, I'm still wedging a cushion in between them to support the top one. I'm still struggling to breathe deeply especially when walking. When I sit for more than ten minutes the top of my stomach seems to seize and then when I stand again it is quite sore, it feels like it's ripping. I try to stretch up a bit but I'm worried about tearing the internal stitches. I had the external stitches out at 2 weeks which they made a bit of a fuss about at the gp as they don't deal with things done privately but because I'd had it done abroad they decided they had a duty of care to do it.

These are at 2 weeks after the stitches came out. I have some swelling here but it's not bad. 

This is what my stomach looked like before I went. I was quoted £7500 for a tummy tuck with muscle tightening and lipo in the uk, in Lithuania it's just under £2000.

I would never have been able to afford to have it done here and certainly wouldn't have been able to have my breasts done as well. I've been depressed about having tiny boobs my entire adult life, I've been walking around for 5 years with this huge belly constantly being asked if I'm pregnant, not being able to find anything to wear that would hide it or I could feel comfortable in. It affected me so much I wouldn't leave the house unless I had to. I hated myself, I felt ugly and couldn't believe my husband could find me attractive so I'd hide from him, avoiding physical contact as much as possible. 

Am I a different person now? No and yes. 

I still have autism and all the personality challenges that come with that. I still have crooked teeth and a bump in my nose and persistent acne on one side of my face. I'm still mum to 6 crazy kids and 2 soon to be 3 grandchildren. 

But I don't hate what I see when I look in the mirror anymore. I'm not punishing myself for the failings of my body. I worked hard to try to fix myself with diet and exercise and it didn't work, it was never going to close that 11cm gap. I don't feel like I have to hide anymore or be ashamed. I'm not perfect but it's enough for me. 

I've still got recovering to do but would I do it again? Absolutely. Would I recommend the clinic? In a heartbeat. It was a risk going abroad for surgery but one I'm so glad I took.  

My advice to others would be don't spend years being unhappy, I wish I'd had this done 5 years ago. It is tough having 2 procedures done at once but if you have good support you'll be fine. It's not vanity when it affects your self esteem and there's nothing wrong with wanting to look nice anyway! I've been slim all my life and I finally feel like myself again and that is definitely worth the few weeks of discomfort. 

This is a link to the core programme I've been doing to fix my core function

https://laurenohayon.com/?rxf=60  Affiliate Link you can also get a $10 discount by adding my code af1060 at checkout

Evening before surgery vlog

This is the link to the next vlog on my surgery


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UvdODqo9I24

Autism research

So yesterday I went to Cambridge University to take part in an autism research project looking at the experience of parenting for people with an autism diagnosis. It was broken down to focus on the following questions.
1. What are the positives of parenting?
I really struggled with this one, I find parenting so hard. For me the positives are having someone to love always and hopefully one or more of them will love you back forever.
2. What are the challenges of parenting?
How long have you got?! There are so many challenges for people with autism.
First and foremost you've got to put someone else first, that's really hard, it means putting yourself in their shoes to some extent to try and work out what they need.
There's a fair chance you'll get a kid on the spectrum so don't count on them being able to tell you what they need. Both having the same thing doesn't mean you'll understand all their struggles especially if they are the opposite to you with regards to sensory input.
It can be hard to focus on the task at hand, I often think about putting on tea then get distracted and then everyone is starving, I forget there's food on and it boils in, gets burnt etc I'm no better organised in the morning than them so if it wasn't for my husband we'd probably be late for school every day.
I can't support them emotionally, this is a big one for me, I probably wouldn't have had kids if I'd known this. There is no room in my brain for other peoples problems, I don't want to hear about so and so at school and after about 60 seconds of being talked at about any subject I've switched off and my mind is elsewhere. I have managed on the whole to find partners who do this really well and this has helped and allowed me to just get the practical stuff done, I'm hot on returning letters, checking for lice, getting teeth brushed, making sure they're not living on junk food etc and laundry, I think I live for laundry. I can't work out where to start with tidying up but I can have your clothes you took off at 8am returned to you washed and dry by lunchtime!
Having to meet other parents, school runs, after school clubs all involve being social and making small talk, the school run in particular really stresses me out, surrounded by loads of people talking, sometimes I try to join in and usually feel I've got it wrong and some days I just try to hide and hope no one will see me.
Noise, kids make a LOT of noise and when you can't stand noise that's a problem.
Kids are demanding, they want answers straight away which I often can't give them especially if there's lots of noise, I try to tell them I'm thinking about said request but they have little patience.
I'm tired, all the time, so just keeping up with them and on top of the tasks of running a house can be overwhelming.
3. How would you describe your approach to parenting?
I used to have a very regimented approach to parenting with the older 4 and now I am probably too laid back. There are some things I'm not prepared to compromise on, being rude and breaking things but I let a lot of their behaviours go because otherwise I would spend my whole life moaning at them.
It's nice if they do well at school but I'm not that bothered about it I would rather they were happy and had a more rounded education including exploring the natural world and travelling and an understanding of other cultures.
4. How would you describe your relationship with your child?
It was suggested the relationship with your child may be dependant on whether they have a diagnosis but that isn't true for me. I have a different relationship with all of them, some I'd say I had a good bond with, others I feel distanced from and some I just can't understand and that makes it hard to build a good relationship. I don't miss my children when I'm away from them which is something I've always felt guilty about so it was comforting to find I'm not alone in that. My children are all quite independent, perhaps because they've learnt they can't rely on me to help them although I am actually amazing at fighting their corner when they need me to. They don't seem to need me and rarely show me any affection.
5. Is there any support that would be useful for autistic parents?
My reply to this was leave us alone. As parents of children on the spectrum we are forced to attend courses to learn about autism so we can learn to change for our child because they cant, not very helpful when you're also autistic. We are forced on parenting courses as we seem clueless how to handle these small strong willed people, we are told we must rein in their behaviour so they don't disturb the outside world and we must help them to change so they can fit in with the "normal" kids.
My friend was telling me the other day that when her son was first diagnosed she went on a course with the national autistic society who said it was highly inappropriate to send parents of autistic children on parenting courses as it suggests it is a parenting failure which of course it is not.
Making us go to support groups to meet other autistic parents is not helpful, we don't like social situations and personally I find people like me quite irritating.
What would be useful is someone to do the things I can't, practical things like cleaning, shopping, playing pretend with the kids. That said I was once offered help from home start which did include those things but I found it to add even more stress having to worry about the state of the house and just knowing someone was coming to the house once a week was horrid.

It was quite an enjoyable experience in the end and I was glad I went.

Pre op vlog

This is the link to my first video logging my tummy tuck journey

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bZMbRM5m384

Tummy Tuck!

Those that have read my post on diastasis recti will know how we've come to this point, if not then I have basically got a massive belly left on my otherwise slim frame which leads to me being asked if I'm pregnant on a fairly frequent basis. I have come to hate what I see in the mirror, nothing I wear can hide it and I avoid leaving the house unless necessary so I don't have to suffer the embarrassment and questions of looking like I do.
My youngest child is 5 at Christmas, I've tried all the advice to lose my belly but even the programmes specifically designed for diastasis recti have not helped either close the gap or the appearance of my tummy.
So when I decided to breed our ragdoll cat I decided there and then that I would use the money for a tummy tuck. Unfortunately she'd need to have 3 litters before I could have it done in the uk so I made the decision to look at having it done abroad.
The first company I contacted told me they only accepted cash?! They then refused to do it when they learned I have autism? The reasoning was that some people with ASD are anatomically different from normal people and the surgeon was worried about how safe it would be to intubate me?! I think this was nonsense I have had plenty of operations and no one has ever suggested such a thing to me before. I think it's more likely that when I listed my medication which includes risperidone they just decided I must be a psycho and didn't want to know. I think it may have been a blessing in disguise really.
I then found another company that seemed a bit more legitimate, they have been used by the tv for makeover programmes and I could find a few genuine reviews from people from the uk who'd used them so I booked my surgery date for 25th October 2017!
I managed to convince my sister to come with me as obviously my husband will need to look after the children and I should be really excited about it.
Instead I find I am absolutely terrified, I am genuinely terrified I'm going to die. I have read all the stories of women who went into cardiac arrest during the operation or died of blood clots or infection a week or so after the operation. I have also googled the thousands of operations that go smoothly but this is giving me little comfort.
Why would I think I would die you might wonder? Well I feel like I'm a fairly unlucky person, if something bad is going to happen it's probably going to happen to me. I have an inability to imagine myself growing old or seeing my youngest 2 grown up so therefore I convince myself it must be because it isn't going to happen. With all the recent terrorist attacks I've become terrified to go anywhere because I can visualise being caught up in an attack and dying. I also have had varicose veins removed from my legs twice and have a large lump behind one knee so I feel I'm a good case for a blood clot. I've had a fair amount of surgery and wonder if this will just be pushing my luck too far?
There's also the overwhelming guilt, what would life be like for my little 2 if I didn't come home? Freya would have no parents, my husband would really struggle to look after them both on his own, would he give her up? And all this because I despise my body?
I have had to come off my medication because they can react with anaesthetic which no doubt isn't helping my mood but I don't know how to get through the next few weeks without being either depressed or in a total panic. Everyone I speak to about it thinks I am being totally ridiculous.
I have told mike where the Halloween and Christmas stuff is and am considering writing the kids letters in case I don't come home.
I've considered cancelling the operation but the thought of spending the rest of my life looking like I'm 7 months pregnant is as bad as the thought of dying.
Just to add to my stress Ryanair have decided to cancel loads of flights after I'd just booked with them so I'm hoping mine won't get cancelled too nearer the time as you can't take out any travel insurance when you're going abroad for surgery!
I am hoping to do some videos of my journey to help anyone else who may be considering this surgery or clinic as there isn't much out there at the moment. Wish me luck!

Daisy, therapy cats vs dogs

There's a fair amount of documentation around about the benefits of a dog for children with autism.
We attended the dogs for good workshops a few years ago with a view to getting a dog to help calm Freya down, we learned how they could be trained to help with meltdowns, getting out of the house, road safety etc etc
I was sold on the idea despite never having owned a dog, (we'd had one when I was a child for about a week before it was rehomed) I spent months researching the best dog for us and decided it would be a Bernese Mountain dog. Why?! you may wonder, they're huge! Yes but gentle giants renowned for their patience and love of children and most importantly for me they have a deep non offensive bark.
So off we went and spent about another year attending all the Bernese events up and down the country to make sure we were doing the right thing. I might add Freya was terrified of dogs and still is but I thought she'd get used to it.
Bernese dogs are fairly pricey to buy, about £1200-£2000 depending on the breeder, you'd think therefore not many people would be after one, you'd be wrong.
I finally met up with one of the best known and most reputable breeders who informed me I would not get one of her dogs, her reasons? the children were too small, I wouldn't have time to train it properly and as my husband was disabled we would not have the strength to control it. I was devastated. She suggested we get a retriever or labrador instead.
I have a friend with a retriever and she is still very hyper at nearly 2, I just didn't think they were a good fit for us.
I searched for a dog that would suit us and we ended up bringing home a cross between a newfoundland, collie and german shepherd, we named him max.
Lucas loved max, he loves all dogs and Freya was as expected terrified for a week or so but she did calm down a bit with him. It turned out it was me that the biggest issue with him.
At first he had come to me all the time, I was the one sat in back of the car with him on the journey home cleaning up his sick, but as the weeks went by and I got more stressed with him having accidents in the house and being the only one that would let him out at 5am, clean up his pooh from the garden or play with him etc he started to bond more with my husband who is generally much calmer than me. This annoyed me even more as I was the one running round after him.
I found it especially hard in the evening when I wanted to relax and he would stand in front of me yapping and jumping about, he started barking whenever the dogs next door barked and poking his head through the hedge to see them, on one occasion he was eating and lucas kept touching his bottom and he turned round and snapped at him, this was the final straw for me.
My husband said he was a good dog but he honestly really scared me and I was going crazy with all the stuff he was ruining and all the noise and dirt. We rehomed him after 4 weeks and he joined a family with 3 other dogs and no small children where he is very happy.
So it turns out dogs are not good for all people with autism and rather than add calm to your household they can just triple the stress.
I can't remember how I stumbled upon some information about ragdolls online but I started to read about them and decided to bring one home last summer.
When we went to view the kittens Daisy was the one that sat still for the kids to stroke her so she came home with us.
Ragdolls are renowned for their patient laid back natures, they love people and follow you around like a dog would just wanting to be where you are.
At first she was a little startled by how much noise the kids made and how fast they sped around the house but she soon became used to it. Within a month or so I noticed how much calmer Lucas was when she was in the room, he can be in the foulest mood in the morning and refuse to get out of bed but as soon as she comes into his room his mood just switches and he gets straight up to give her a stroke. She has been so patient with him carrying her around, wrapping her up in blankets, putting feathers and hats on her, she just lies there.
We currently have 5, 7 week old kittens and while we are having some issues with Lucas's behaviour with them the kittens are already demonstrating their wonderful temperaments.
I know lots of people have said their lives have been changed by having an assistance dog but for us our Daisy is a much better therapy cat.

I don't think I'll survive this summer break!

So we're 2 weeks into the summer holiday and I've been in total stress mode for the best part of it. I hear there are people that actually enjoy the summer break and relish in the time spent with their offspring but I'm definitely not one of them.
We currently have 5, 7 week old kittens and these present extra stress for me as they'll be here until mid September. On Sunday Lucas tried to kill one of them, really? you ask. I was in the garden with my husband and Freya and he'd come in the house, I assumed for the loo but after about 5 minutes I wondered why he hadn't come back. You have to watch Lucas 24/7 there are very few times that he is actually doing something normal like watching tv or playing appropriately with his toys, usually he's just stealing food or breaking something or drawing on my walls or furniture or smearing something somewhere etc, he has been overly "loving" the kittens since they were born and has trapped them, held them down, pulled them by their tails etc in an effort to just be with them. Anyway I wasn't expecting to come in the house to find one lying not breathing in the middle of the lounge floor with a string pulled tight around it's neck. Lucas jumped when he heard me coming and moved away from it, I was in total shock and panic and couldn't think what to do, I screamed for my husband while holding it. After a minute or maybe a few seconds I don't know I suddenly realised I needed to get the string off, it was totally limp so I thought it was dead but as I tried to pull it off it gave a tiny wiggle. I couldn't get it off and ran to get scissors and typically couldn't find any, my husband had appeared by now and tried to cut it off with a knife which didn't work as it was quite thick but by now I'd found the scissors and he cut it free. It immediately perked up but I was hysterical by this point. All I could think was my son is a murderer, I remember reading somewhere that serial killers start by abusing animals at a young age and here he was strangling a kitten that he claimed to love.
My husband thinks I'm insane, he thought maybe he was just trying to take it for a walk or something and hadn't meant to hurt it, he also claims he killed his first fish by keep taking it out of the water to look at it?!
I know children with autism struggle with empathy but I just don't believe that he didn't understand what he was doing, he's 4 and a half now he's not a baby and he knows right from wrong, if it was an accident why did he jump when I came in?
We had his appointment with the child development centre this week and the paediatrician confirmed my fears that this was not normal and needed further involvement from a psychiatrist, as he put it, not having empathy doesn't mean you go out of your way to hurt something.
Following on from that is both Freya and Lucas's obsession with trying to hold each others heads under the water every time they get in the paddling pool?! Again I feel they're both old enough to understand how dangerous this is and have had it explained to them a hundred times but still think it's a really good idea!
We've tried to get them out of the house as often as we can afford/handle but there has to be some time when we're just at home and this is when they're at their craziest. They were upstairs the other day and there was suddenly an almighty crash down the stairs, it sounded like a wall falling down but turned out to be lucas had decided to push a heavy wooden stool to the top of the stairs and let go?! Needless to say that was the end of the stool which broke into 3 pieces and made some lovely marks in my wall on the way down.
Even when we take them out it's like there's a timer on their good behaviour and usually by the time we get back in the car after a nice trip out they are back to behaving like 2 starved lions fighting over a piece of meat! I have never met kids that fight as much as mine do :(
I have 4 and a half more weeks of holiday to get through and every day seems like a mini victory but you know it all starts again tomorrow :/